Sunday, September 18, 2011

And that's why

I had a very sad little girl on Tuesday. I got a text at cheer practice from her Daddy that said her beloved brown rabbit Buck had died. When I told her, she of course was heart-broken. She shouted, "God should have taken someone else's rabbit, not my Buck." But after a few minutes of tears, she came back up to me and said, "Well, Buck was sick. He's with his babies now in Heaven. I'm sorta glad God picked him today." Over the summer her rabbits had a litter and all died over a week's time. (Click here to read that story)

B's new rabbit "Blackie"
Today her Daddy made good on his promise and instead of church, the two of them went shopping at the local flea market along with the grandpa. This gave my son and I a chance to have some quality time. On the way to church, we talked about being SAVED. I asked a simple question. "Do your friends ever mention God, or do they talk about getting Saved?" Although I kind of guessed what the answer would be, he confirmed it with a "No." And that is why the rabbit died this week, that is why we had some one on one time, that is why that question came into my head.

Christ has an amazing ability to show people what they need to see. When we got to church, several things hit home...and wouldn't you know it, the message was about parenting and getting Saved. When the service was over, my child said to me "How did you know he was gonna talk about that today?" And I just smiled.

Years ago, I was shown something about this child, by God himself and I chose to turn the other cheek. As a one year old deaf child who could only cry for communication, I had decided to have a major operation, without praying about it first. A desperate mother trying to giver her child a voice, one that others could hear and understand without needing a parent's interpretation. I wanted him to hear music, hear danger, and hear my voice.

The day before his surgery, my boss passed away. He'd been living with cancer over a course of two years and had become unrecognizable to most by his physical appearance. He was a strong Christian and was proud of it. He was often found at the watercooler talking of sermons and Sunday School. I had a strong urge to reschedule my son's surgery because I wanted, and needed to say goodbye to my boss. But instead of praying, I knew what was best and showed up at the hospital. With my baby in tow, I signed him up quickly for the four hour surgery. So quickly in fact, I didn't notice all the paper work had the wrong ear listed. A nurse caught the error, his surgery was delayed while new paper work had to be drawn, and then signed. When they finally took him back, I was almost sick with the thought that it was just all wrong. But I turned the other cheek, handed my baby over. I was a nervous wreck, and after four and half hours with absolutely NO WORD from the operating room on his condition, I began to panic. Soon a nurse flung open the doors to find us in a large and almost empty waiting room. She said nervously, "The doctor wants to see you in private."

Can you imagine the thoughts in a parent's head? I knew I should have listened, obeyed but I didn't. I denied that it was God trying to show me the way. With my heart beating rapidly the doctor told us, he had to abort the surgery. He couldn't even identify parts of my child's ear because they were so microscopic and malformed, he just didn't recognize the cochlea...the one part he needed to place the device that could change my child's life. He also told us that his face was paralized on the right side.

Gage with facial paralysis
But you know what? The Lord forgave me, and then I forgave myself. So I for one, know that when you turn the other cheek, you'd better make sure it isn't The Lord trying to speak to you. And that's why I pray when I need guidence. It's easier to get the right directions when you just ask for them first instead of driving around on the assumption you'll know where you're going when you get there.

(to be continued)

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