Monday, January 16, 2012

Different Plans part 1

I'm still devouring the messages we've experienced at church on Sunday. From Sunday School to the morning service to the Sunday night message as well. We began in Sunday School discussing Faith. We were given examples of how having confidence in people is fine but our Faith belongs with God.

When my son was one, we took him in for a surgery that I really had little hopes of working. I in fact said, "I'll believe it when I see it," as we made final preparations to prepare a deaf child to become a hearing deaf child. I didn't practice my Faith going into it. We'd been out of church for quite some time and all I prayed was that he'd be safe.

After over four hours a nurse burst through to doors to waiting room and with a concerned tone she said, "The doctor needs to see private." I jumped to my feet and with my husband by my side, we walked to a room. Our hearts raced and I stood there cracking my knuckles until the doctor walked in. With disappointment on his face, he took a deep breath and told us that he couldn't do it. He said he drilled and drilled and just could not locate the part of his ear that he needed to place the implant's make my baby hear. He also added that he thought his face was paralyzed too. And it was. With a sigh of relief that my baby was safe, alive, and in recovery...I think I smiled. For a moment I thought he was going to tell me that he was gone. But right then, I knew God did exactly what I had asked, he kept him safe.

For a long time, I went over in my head what we should have done differently. Weeks and months passed. He learned to eat and drink and make a few sounds with half of his face drooping with paralysis. We had survived yet another obstacle. This is time in my life, I began getting closer to God. I was saved as a child of twelve years old but my spiritual growth was practically dormant. I prayed when I needed something. The more I prayed the more I saw Him. As we said in church, we don't always get the results we as sinners are looking for. But if nothing more than the fact that I started growing spiritually with all of the trials we went through with my son as he endured surgery after surgery after surgery, he's got to be approaching twenty or more procedures and operations for this child, with more to come at some point in his future, we were following God's plan which had been different than mine. I watched as his face slowly but surely started strengthening again, and one day he smiled, both sides of his lips curled up and the paralysis was almost completely gone away.

The next time we were scheduled for this major operation, as one last attempt to help a deaf child hear, I knew I had it right. My confidence was there. The doctor scheduled the surgery three months in advance to give him time. He wanted to talk to other specialists, and he said he needed the three months to pray about it. I think I did too. By the morning of the operation I walked in with my head held high. I told the doctors that it was okay to abort the surgery again if any problems arise, I wanted him safe, I expected him to come out of that O.R. safe, and I knew he would. I had asked God to send a special Angel to hold my baby's hand while in there. This time, I had it right, "I believed it, so I would I see it."

3 yrs old-Successful surgery
The confidence I had in the doctors helped that time, but the Faith in God is why my child who anatomically probably shouldn't hear, does hear today. God has the ability to make the blind see and the deaf hear. We don't know what His plan is but He is in control. Not every prayer is answered in the way we expect. But we expect they will be answered, as they always are. I knew that at the final completion of this surgery, we-as a family-would begin a new normal. A whole new way of communication was headed for my home, whether it be a manual mode or verbal mode, our frustrations were about to be lifted and we would move forward. And my little baby of just nine months old was slowly becoming a deaf child too, and we had no idea.

That was just one part of the message today...(to be continued)

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