Wednesday, May 30, 2012

But I Do

On the way to church, I was silenced and quickly put in my place. My throat seized up and I wasn't sure He'd ever let me speak again. I had just asked my precious child to give me a break. I needed silence, for just a moment. I guess the excitement of getting out and seeing her best friend after not seeing her at school today had her all wound up...she was talking-nonstop ever since we left the house. I selfishly asked her to stop talking...for just a few minutes. As soon as those words came out of my mouth, she stopped mid-sentence and politely looked out of her window while tears filled my eyes and a lump filled my throat.

I began thinking about all those times I was pushing my first born in grocery stores or department stores and hearing parents tell their kids to be quiet. I'd watch as words flowed out of their little mouths, their little brains stimulated by everything around them. Some mothers would push their children around with blank looks upon their faces and I knew they weren't really listening to their children. I would simply walk past with my rapid heartbeat and my face drawn wondering if they knew how Blessed they were that their children could even speak. I would tell myself that if my children could hear and speak like that, I'd never tell them to be quiet. But I do.

My sweet little girl gave about thirty seconds of quiet until she just couldn't stand it anymore. She looked over at me and began another one of her wonderful little stories and she stopped and said, "Are you crying?" I guess I was. The Lord had showed me something and I hadn't even made it to church yet. I reached over and grabbed her little plump hand and just smiled. The lump remained in my throat the entire service and all I could think about was how Blessed I am, that my child can sit next me and hear the depth, the beauty, the wealth of my little country church.

Soon to be Angels softly sang behind us on that pew, and I thanked Him for letting us hear them. The piano keys were pressed firmly and the music Blessed our ears, and I watched the songs hug each and every person as fingers were tapping, hands were clapping and voices were ringing. I watched my child not hesitate when the preacher announced what Book he'd be reading from...she simply picked up her Bible and searched for Psalms. Most people don't realize that in itself is a gift from The Lord.

As we were about to leave, a tiny little girl who has known us now for a year asked my daughter what was on her ears. My little girl smiled shyly and told me to tell her. As I explained to her that they help her hear, without those, she hears nothing...I realized that most children notice them right away. I was actually surprised that she had not noticed them until now.

I once told myself that I wouldn't take these little things for granted, but I do. I don't deserve to receive any of these Blessings, but He gives them to me anyway.

1 comment:

  1. I guess I'm not the only one! Thanks for sharing :)