Thursday, February 28, 2013

The Calling of the Geese

I could here them outside as I walked across my kitchen. I ran to the back door and stood with the door opened, just so I could listen to them. I always think of church when I hear the geese. The tall man from Sunday School once said the geese cheer the one leading the flock on the entire time they fly until he gets too tired. He'll then move to the back and another one will take lead so the others can rest until it is their turn to lead once again. I smiled and closed the door after they had passed, knowing it was Wednesday, and in a few short hours, I'd be parked on a pew, ready to cheer someone on, as they took their turn doing Devotion.

I know the feeling of being asked to do Devotion. You really never know when someone will ask you to stand in front of the church and read from the Bible or tell a story of what God's done for you. Sadly, it can be one of the most dreaded honors you'll ever have to face. Most of us don't look forward to standing up in front of dozens upon dozens of people and talking or crying, whichever comes first. But the second you get yourself out of the way, and realize you aren't there for them, you are there for HIM, The Lord takes over and sees you through it...and that feels amazing.

I thought about her all day, because I knew it was her turn. After all, I had asked her to do it myself. The minute I had reached down and whispered in her ear the very night I had stood up there in tears, excitement lit her face and she said, "Yes. I knew you were gonna ask me." Without a doubt, without fear, the nine year old accepted my request without hesitation.

It was her turn now. She had kept in secret from her parents what she would actually be reading in her Bible. As she walked to the front, I found myself full of anticipation. She was leading the geese, and I was silently cheering her on. She confidently opened her Bible and said, "Genesis 1." She lifted the pocket light she carries around and lit the words that fell on her dark page. Most everyone in that room, knows that she technically sees more darkness than the average eyes see so that little light she carries can be just what she needs to cut through the dark.

She had whispered to me just the other day that she woke before anyone else in her house. She smiled that contagious grin and told me she reached over and grabbed her light and read her Bible noting it was her quiet time. My heart lifted as she began to read the words, "Then God said, 'Let there be Light.' And there was light, And God saw the Light, that it was good; and God divided the light from the darkness..."

I kept reading those words over and over, even after she had finished. I thought of how she carries a light wherever she goes, both literally and Spiritually. At the ripe age of nine, she really don't need to keep that light in her pocket to lead others from the darkness. Feeling Blessed once again this day, in a might Mighty way. It amazes me how HE will take a child of darkness, and give her light. Just as he created day and night, you and me. Her light will shine for others for years to come, be it in HIS Will and I'm amazed He chose me to stand in her shadow and face this light. I love the way the calling of the geese sounds! I just need to practice this outside of the church walls more.

Sunday, February 24, 2013

I Just Wanted to Say...

I sat quietly on the pew completely aware of everyone around me, but knowing that soon, it would be just me and The Lord. Again in the very early dark morning, I had found myself down on my knees praying. I felt like I had not prayed long enough but when my head rose I could see the break of day, and I longed for that pew...

I closed my eyes several times in the middle of different songs to hear with my heart, and not my ears. Everytime my eyes shut an image of that man, pierced with thick nails and blood draining from his skin was pasted on the inside of my eye lids, and HE was looking at me...

I tried to see through the liquid glass that coated my vision and could barely make out a man and his mother standing before us in song. She has that voice that every church needs. With just the right amount of The Bible Belt mixed with the confidence of her age, she means every word she's ever sang. I wonderd how it felt for the two kin, to be standing side by side, singing for HIM.

One after the other, the Testifiers stood. I could see them speak, I could hear their words but I could only feel HIM, and HE was everywhere in that room. They spoke of the child again,...the one who had died many years ago in a car wreck just after this little country church had dismissed from one of the evening services. I didn't know this church even existed at that time, but HE already knew I'd one day be part of it. There are many who are no longer seated on these pews and The Lord must think my little family is something special, to have hand-picked us to sit in their place. The teen's mother spoke from the piano bench about having to say goodbye to her oldest child that day, and her fingers began to gently play on the old ivory keys. When she finished, she began to sing. Words left her heart and a smile came upon her face and I just wanted to say, I'm looking forward to Heaven too!

A grown child of the man who sits on the front row and touches the cross on the side of his pew with tips of his fingers, stood to lead a song. Her Daddy stood up beside her and with his arm around his baby girl, she cried out that Jesus did it for her, HE died on the cross for her. I could no longer tell if I was crying or smiling anymore as I watched her call out to her brother that sat on a pew with his family. The two siblings like to joke between them, which one their Daddy thinks is the favorite child, much like my two children do...and all I could think of is what her Daddy had said a long time ago...The Lord makes us all feel like we are HIS favorite child. HE can give her exactly what she needs and still touch her brother's heart at the exact same moment meeting a different need, and put the peace and stillness around me as if I'm the only child.

Soon the other piano player had taken his seat. I had watched his hands earlier as he'd sat at playing. His fingers moved fast across the keys and I knew The Lord had something in store for Him too. He quietly openend his song book and in a meek voice his words swelled form his chest. "I just wanted to say I love The Lord." Such simple words but often go unsaid, even by my own lips. Next the tall man spoke about the brother he's lived without for 15 years now since that night he left this world and went to be with The Father. Soon, they all began the song they had intended to sing but the one who leads the songs began to cry from his heart. Their song stopped right in the middle and he began to speak too. I began the quietly thank HIM for giving to all of us once again, as if each and every single one of us was his favorite child. The Lord was moving all around that room and I can't wait to go back tonight.
I just wanted to say, I love HIM

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

The Sound of Silence

I expected something big. I found myself alone for a change and I wanted to walk outside and see what HE had for me today. I could see my children everywhere, though they weren't home. Old hot wheels that have long been buried in the earth from forgetful play could be seen peeking over the soil that has washed away from the rain. An old hairbrush lied next to the rabbit cages where my daughter had groomed her beloved pets. The noise of nature surrounded me as I walked on...

I was drawn to the cane. A large arching trail cut right the center of it looked beautiful as the thick bamboo invited me closer. It was a lovely spot and my children had made it special. I stood still and smiled for a while until the dreary clouds parted and allowed the sun to warm my back. It felt so good and I knew HE was there.

I continued walking around the property picking up tiny pine cones to just feel the prickling of their skin. I had to stop and feel the bark of a tree I just couldn't pass without my palm gracing the soft of the moss. I looked at everything, careful not to miss the big.

I had finally made my way out to the old cabin's porch. The smell of a weekend burn still permeated in the ashes of the fire pit. I looked around as I awaited my big from The Lord. I talked to HIM briefly with my eyes wide open and I knew he would answer the prayer of "Show me Lord."

Drops of rain began to fall on the old tin roof but it was like nothing I've ever heard before. They sounded heavy and slow and I could almost hear them echo in the deep silence in which I sat.
They got heavier and slower. A plump bird with its thick breast on display, called out but the silence was undisturbed. He took flight and I could hear his wings flap as wind sheared each feather. I turned my head slowly back and forth knowing the big was on its way.

I became thirsty and my mouth went dry and I said under my breath, "Forgive me, for I'm still thirsty" and a tear came to my eye. The silence pounded but it felt so good to hear it. The smell of fresh cut pecan and walnut trees caressed me as the wind carried their scent over from the wood pile. I sat quietly and took in every little drop HE gave me and soon, I didn't thirst anymore. I smiled the whole walk home knowing how BIG, that little was.

Today, my world slowed down. I felt the cool of the wind and the warm of the sun. I heard the beautiful sound of silence. I was in need, and HE supplied me. I am thankful today, that even when I look for the BIG, HE knows it's the little that I really need. Blessed to be HIS today!

Monday, February 4, 2013

The Meeting

A smile painted across my face as I awoke once more, to find my beloved Sunday morning. I made my way quietly through the house, careful not to wake anyone else in the tribe. I sat in the dark, almost alone, where HE could feel my heart. I closed my eyes and just HIM.

A tear came to my eye as I lifted my head, and knew my invitation had been sent. I had prayed for my Brothers and Sisters of the church, hoping they too, would all open their invitations this crisp February morning and attend The Meeting. We only needed our flesh to open those glass doors of that old country church but we needed HIS blood to feel what awaited on the other side of them.

It didn't take long until we had placed our aging bodies upon that pew and as I quietly looked around, I knew they had all walked in expecting something. A mighty group of sinners sat as individuals, but there was one single reason, we soon became one. The piano softened the air and voices joined. A chorus of Believers rang loud in glorious harmony and I could feel the chill.

The Altar became a sea of people with waves of sin, worry and heartache washing away. Those who never speak, spoke. Children sang louder than we did, and The Lord gave to us all. Though we were a body of one at that very moment, HE knew us still, as individuals.

I wasn't sure how much this simple flesh could take in this one Meeting, when HE took over. I could hear without listening, I could see without looking, I could feel without moving, and my heart beat on...

None of us knew that this was only the beginning of what HE would do for us this day. We all left with reddened eyes back to our cars, our families, our houses for just a little while. HE had already sent out invitations to come back to HIS House the same evening, and I am so glad I accepted mine.

The room seemed as full after darkness had fallen as it had been when the sun rose high above our little country church. The feel of that room had not changed since I left it. I could feel the breath of the first song, it was that close. There was no effort behind the tears that began to flood around me. Again, many stricken with challenges, heartache and worry stood to tell how great HE is. I heard softened voices and I was certain Angels came down to sing. I knew The Lord was strengthening His Church. HE could have left The Meeting alone as it had ended this morning, but HE gave us more.

The preacher finally stood in front of the church. That alone was something he couldn't do on his own this morning. Spiritual exhaustion had weakened his legs but this night, he stood tall and asked if anyone wanted to join the church. From the other side of the room, a beautiful little teenager walked to the front and stood in front of her Daddy. Tears rolled down her cheeks and they burst from mine. Her brother and Mother walked up and stood by her side and our Preacher stepped down and hugged them all. The family who has given so much to us, wanted their hearts to stay. They each spoke with broken words as His loved poured from their eyes, but their hearts were as one...and HE honored that.

The unexpected revival at our little country church was exactly what we wanted, and what we needed. We often have Spirit-filled services but if you were on a pew this day, inside those four walls, you know what a Giving God we have. We ask for a little taste of Heaven sometimes, and HE gives us as much as our flesh can stand. Thank you Lord for the invitation to The Meeting, I am so glad I accepted!